A wise man once said, "Love is to the heart like sunshine is to flowers". Love is not about giving. Nor is it about receiving. It is about Being. What does that mean? The Sun doesn't attempt to shine for the flowers, or for anyone else for that matter. It just shines because that is it's very nature. And because it shines, life flourishes around it. We have an entire Solar system, and within it the planet Earth with its gazillion species including us humans, thriving in the Sun's presence. So does this ball of Hydrogen and Helium love us ? Absolutely !
So what is Love? Love is about being the best that you can be at any given moment. Love is about fulfilling your potential. It is about making a commitment to yourself to be the best that you are capable of at all times, while allowing yourself and others to be human. Love is about an unconditional acceptance that is free of judgement and prejudice. It is about celebrating the different paths we all choose for our journeys towards understanding ourselves and knowing who we are, rather than cloning everyone around us to become mini-me'z.
Whether I am a parent, a child, a sibling, a romantic partner, or a spouse - the same applies. When I am at my best, I am in my joy. When I am in my joy, I am naturally loving to those around me. And then those I love feel inspired to be their best. I become sunshine !
Love and attachment are often mistaken for each other, but they are 2 very different things. To attach is to impose our expectations on another. "If you do not behave or conform to my desires or outlook of how things should be, then you are unworthy of love." This is attachment. In love, you accept the other for being who they choose to be, while still loving, sharing with and supporting them.
Does this mean that in love there should not be any expectations? That is not what it means. Every relationship has its nature, and boundaries based upon it. Fire's nature is heat. Sugar's nature is sweetness. You cannot touch fire bare skinned and not expect to get burnt. Based on the nature of two different interacting forces, we have to set boundaries to avoid harm. Everything in Nature has its nature. It is the same with every relationship. Fidelity in a romantic relationship or marriage is natural. Parents feeding their children until they are old enough and trained to do so by themselves is also natural. These attributes are part and parcel of healthy relationships of these kind. Of course, not everyone follows the nature of their respective relationships always. That is why we have to set boundaries in all our relationships and laws are in place to protect us in extreme instances.
Coming back to love. Love is a natural outpouring of the joy of who we be. The more we discover who we are, and follow our inspiration, the more love we become capable of expressing. To love ourselves is to be true to what we feel and follow it. To love others is to share our joy with them. When we do so, we will be amazed to find that joy reflected back to us in myriad ways.
Keep shining !
Haresh Manglani is a Mentor and Energy Healer. He works together with his clients to build their self-acceptance and confidence in the areas of Self, Value, Relationships and Purpose. Visit www.hareshmanglani.com to learn more.