How do you measure the value of something? In Economics, we are taught that the value of any object is based on the abundance of resources necessary to create it relative to the demand for it. So value is relative in the objective world.
Does the same measure apply to how we value the people in our lives? In the workplace, Yes. After all, employee salaries are based on the skills and talents they bring to their employers which in turn generates revenue and profit. The more you generate in monetary terms, the more you get paid. In this case we can say value is based on usefulness. This is also relative.
How about at home, in our social circles, or the world at large? Here another element comes in - Identification. To the degree that someone sees you as one of their own, they will value you. That varies from being valued as a member of a family, a community or even a nation. Even this is relative. As long as one meets the criteria necessary to be accepted as part of that institution, they are valued. The moment they choose differently, that value can change. As our hearts and minds change, so does what we identify with. We can change our friends as we grow, we can change our passports, and we can change our ideals. We can even change families - our parents or children might decide to no longer associate with us when we no longer meet their expectations. As the saying goes, "It's my way or the highway". The foundation of all these types of relationships is based entirely on attachment.
It is possible to be in a relationship, where one is completely loved and accepted for who they be and whatever choices they make. Such relationships are rare and a true blessing. It takes a person who truly understands and lives Love to be able to love this way, as I described in my October Insight on Love. Such love is absolute.
So why am I talking about Value? Because our entire interaction with ourselves and the world around us, is based on how we value ourselves. We project our sense of value on everything - objects, people, situations. And the world reflects those very same projections back to us, mirroring how we see our selves. It is fair to say our relationship with wealth and abundance is also a direct reflection of how we value ourselves.
So how do we measure value when we apply it to ourselves? It is the degree to which we are true to our calling. A great Master has defined sin as the angle of deviation between what we know to be true and what we choose to do instead. To the degree our action compromises on our truth, to that degree we would be "sinning". This is a broad definition. In this context, a deviation from following our truth would also be a sin. After all, the outcome would only lead to sorrow. Another common way we describe this is, "compromising on our value".
So why would we compromise on our value? Pre-conceived notions about what is right and wrong which we have picked up while growing up in certain environments - family, friends, community. To understand our value we have to first understand what it is to compromise on our value.
I met a hairdresser recently who is a very amicable chap. He is excellent at what he does and I really enjoyed my haircut. We were chatting during the haircut, and I asked him how he got into this line of work. The man has been cutting hair for 30 odd years. He said when he was around ten years of age he started cutting his own hair and had very clear ideas on how to style hair. When he was in high school he started helping others. He felt he was lazy because he wasn't very good at studying. When he finished schooling he tried his hand at a job which didn't work out. Then he thought about what's the easiest way to make money, and he decided to style hair because it was natural and effortless for him. Today the man styles hair of models, celebrities and the like, and he travels all over to style hair while being part of an expansion venture of hair salons internationally. Who would have thought cutting hair is so profitable ! It is a common false notion that only doctors, lawyers and bankers make good money.
I bring this up as an example of a man who chose to be true to what he felt and is very successful because of it. When one is true to one's self and one's conviction, one is valuing themselves. And such valuation brings not only success, but also peace and contentment.
Follow your calling.
Not sure what your calling is? Try the "I Am..." mentoring series.
Haresh Manglani is a Mentor and Energy Healer. He works together with his clients to build their self-acceptance and confidence in the areas of Self, Value, Relationships and Purpose. Visit www.hareshmanglani.com to learn more.