Firstly you need to understand what is the emotion that you are experiencing. Sometimes it’s not clear. Especially if you have been raised in an environment where emotions are suppressed because it’s not logical or appropriate according to those around you. However, at some point it catches up with you and you realize something in you is not aligned with your whole being. And that’s because you have been ignoring it for a very long time. 

 

So coming back to how to identify the emotion. Use your intuition. Your heart will tell you. And if you still find it challenging, ask someone who is a honest sounding board. That person might be able to help you identify it. 

 

Once you grasp what the emotion is, journal the circumstances, describing clearly and without embellishment, what they were when you felt that emotion. Was it something someone said? Was it something going on in the background? Was it the tone, the words spoken or the implication you understood from it? What colour was the person wearing? How were you feeling at the time e.g. hot or cold ? It could be anything. 

 

Once you have described it fully, go back and read what you have written. What stands out as the trigger? What made you lose your composure? Sometimes it’s not self evident. In which case ask someone who you trust to be objective to hear your description and give some feedback. 

 

Once you have spotted what created the reaction, look at the circumstances and ask yourself, when else have you acted this way and what were the circumstances? What were your feelings and thoughts as you were going through that time? Is there something in common with what you experienced recently? Is there a pattern, a series of such recurring events? And if so, what is it showing you about who you are and what is making you feel out of balance. 

 

Once that is clear, evaluate if you are now ready to change the pattern. Do you feel empowered in yourself to do so? And what new heart guided step(s) can you take on an ongoing basis so that the next time you can respond instead of react? Imagine it, feel it and think it so you can make it real and possible for you. Conscious day dreaming is one good way to get there. Monitor and journal your process and progress. 

 

If you cannot see what is going on within you clearly, ask for help from a mentor who you feel can help you navigate the process. I offer mentoring sessions and conversations where we can explore what your challenges are and how to navigate them. 

 

I am happy to have a brief complimentary conversation to discuss how I can help you through what I offer. You can contact me by booking a session through my website or writing an email.